Doubts in the Eye of Dignity

I am by means no exceptional.

Here it goes, I may suffer delusions that I am academically gifted but I guess it was time that my bubble bursts. First term result is already in the line *yellow line, perhaps not be crossed too early*. But reexamining my so-so performances in the first term, I guess it’s time for me to move some butt off!

The previous term, I had this kinda problem with Physics but I bother nothing at all. But this time, new setback arouses, Chemistry has no shyness to line up in manner! I bother you the most lah, FKAX0113/0114! You have doubtlessly stole most of my tutorials-in-the-making time, robbed a big portion of my adrenalines, and now when I am so close completing you, you send me Dr Roslinda Ithnin with her weird little details on “Acid and Bases” which I carelessly slip. *MAJOR SIGH.

I wonder whether you’re worth it after all, and I wonder why you make yourself so jual mahal. Chemistry lectures these days are so cliché, you’re the new vogue, no doubt.

With projects to be settled, and debate crisis arouses, I think I know why people preferred to nikah awal. But not me, of course. Boyfriend pon tak ada! I have studied a lot about myself and about what my families, my pals claimed to be “right”. Ultimately, though, I can only accept parts of what others think I should do or should be. I have come to realize that I will have to do things in my own way, and so I thank everybody for their input. The last leg of my journey is going to be done solo.

Courage is the human virtue that counts most. Courage to act on limited knowledge and insufficient evidence. That’s all any of us have. For me, my strongest grip would be hands from my parents. It used to. Now, I feel like I’m being abonded, parents are now strangers for me. Where are you mama? Where are you abah by the time I need you the most?? I am not any of the version of Si Tanggang Betina.


Miss Kiasatina Othman


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