Matter Unsolved



Probably I’m writing this post because I’m in a deep heartquake. Would you ever take off the extra eyes you are wearing now and rub away all the dust blurring your eyes and give a hell sigh of realize that I’m not in like but I’m in love. I’m not in a relationship that’s so safe it has all the passion of a lukewarm mug of Horlicks. We probably started off as friends (it was a swift one) before I knew it, it grew as “a couple”. I really don’t want to split up and lose that warm feeling, but sometimes I fantasize about falling for someone truly, madly, and deeply – not just comfortably. But whenever I psych myself into making the big break, there it goes, you did something lovely and I suddenly realize how much I’d miss you if you weren’t around. Would you ever realize that I don’t want this to happen to me???? I want it to be like… when I hear your voice… I can’t hear anything but a chorus of angle and exploding fireworks! Humph and it’s too not like, if deep down I suspect you’re a pretty nice bloke, then there’s nothing to stop me taking things emotionally. Hell no please!!!





I believe that our distance is no biggie now. Yes, when I’ve been in love and lust before, being apart has always been an Olympian effort. So right now, I have to turn out being different in such way that I will not watch the clock all day and counts all those nanoseconds… can I say that the longer we have been together the more my libido has been waning? Haha. From the beginning he kind of swept me along in his enthusiasm but my feeling never matched this. (Needless to say, I’m sorry). Still lah… it’s not like any other guy was in the wings making me an offer to go out so I thought I’d enjoy the ride, which now has gone on too long. Please lah! I love it the way of Julie and Qusyairi making love to each other (whoa now I remembered Asyraf’s saying regarding is it the love that you make or you making love? Haha). Julie and Qusyairi told that they live each day as if it were their last and live each night as if it were their first. You guys rocks lah! All I can see was that so far your relationship’s been all burning loins, pounding hearts and frantic clothes removal! Winks3





So now, I’ve come to an end whereby I have to stop and longing between the diverging roads, the two proportions; either I want to grab you back or remain hysterically with these sickening wave. For the time being, I don’t know. And I don’t want to know…

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P/s If Eshwaren Maniharen is reading this post, Oh MAN! I remembered u told me – having someone to love doesn’t solve any of damn probs. In fact, it adds more to it. Even if someone walk outta your life, bother nothing because there’s nothing you can do…

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